My family has spent the last week teetering on the edge of our download limit. Transgression of this limit results in excessive fines. In the last few days of the month we were forced to turn the internet off completely as we were 62b over.
Leading up to this period of hardship I was collecting links to be viewed upon the return of download freedom and I present them to you now, the good with the bad. Please enjoy:
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I find it interesting that an important part of human happiness seems to be biological. Chemicals in our brain like Seratonin and Dopamine have a significant effect on our feelings of well-being. Certain drugs known as SSRIs (Selective Seratonin Reuptake Inhibitors) are prescribed for the treatment of depression. SSRIs work by inhibiting our brain’s natural process of reuptake which has the effect of increasing the level of Seratonin available. Interestingly, Cocaine has a similar mechanism of action on Dopamine but is far more effective (showing an increase of up to 150 percent).
Drugs like ecstasy and other amphetamines cause the brain to flush its stores of dopamine into the brain providing the user with a wave of euphoria. The difference between ecstasy and an SSRI is that the SSRI provides a stable and sustainable long-term increase of Seratonin absorption in the brain, whereas ecstasy provides a short term boost at the expense of long-term well-being. Furthermore ecstasy can actually be harmful to the mechanisms which it triggers, potentially damaging the areas that provide dopamine to the brain.
But if there was a middle-ground, a legal drug that was more effective than an SSRI without damaging the brain, would you take it? If scientific studies showed that feelings of happiness, contentment and well-being experienced significant gains with minimal side-effects would you take the drug?
I imagine some people would feel like artificially induced happiness is somehow false or fake, I’m not sure I agree. The levels of Seratonin and Dopamine in the brain vary from person to person, hence the need for SSRIs in the first place, and yet no one talks about the artificiality of the feelings enjoyed by those naturally happier folk.
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So I am studying David Malouf’s poetry in Australian Literature. My exam is tomorrow and I was just reading over this poem. It is my favourite at the moment. I hope you enjoy it too.
Silvery spellbound
trunks. Bark curled
and crisped like dry pork-crackling. Scooped
shadows in glazed snowdrifts. And these
deer knocking their antler-buds on wood, where do they
come in?
The snowy spaces
of a page are their habitat, call up
trees and this nomad herd would find them.
Eye-pulp turned liquid
in a camera flash, they
startle. Trunks
vibrate to percussive thuds. The woods are barely
visible now
in the clouds they make, the pack of
their bodies, the meaty hot
smoke of their blood.
In our veins, slow-spreading
thunder. Unrecorded the lightening-stroke.
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Just finished reading this post about online eulogies and the decline of livejournal. I was particularly interested in the idea of a person’s last words remaining online forever via Facebook, Twitter, Blog, whatever. If I died right now my Facebook last words would be: “My tummy hurts.”
When I was in high school I joked with a friend of mine about the idea of filming my own eulogy to have it played at my funeral. I could say everything I ever wanted to say to people but never had the stones to while I was still alive to face the consequences. I could tell people I thought they were fit, stupid, annoying, fat, whatever. I could say goodbye to people and let them know how much they really meant to me. Of course any eulogy I filmed would be a product of the time period it was filmed in. The way my life is going at the moment any eulogy older than six months would be painfully out of date.
I used to think about what I would like to have done with my body when I died. Friends of mine reminded me recently, during a dinner with my girlfriend, about one of my stranger ideas. The proposition: When I died I would have all my property sold and the money converted into 1 and 2 dollar coins. My body would be hollowed out and turned into a pinata with the coins used as stuffing. If my family wanted their inheritence they would have to beat it out of me.
I don’t remember all the other ideas, but one involved having my body cremated along with a recording of my voice screaming, “It burns, it burns!” There was also some mention of a motor inside the coffin to simulate rocking and banging. Another idea specified the donation of my body to an art gallery where it would be displayed in a glass case along with a few flies which would turn my body into a maggot farm. There would be sticks built into the case, to be manipulated from exterior, so that people could prod my corpse.
I think I would consider putting cannibalism of my corpse in my will as a requirement for inheritence if it was legal. Does anyone know if it’s illegal to eat cremains?
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**Warning: This post contains spoilers for Watchmen**
I have an exam tomorrow so I spent the morning reading critical essays on the genres of Tragedy and Film Noir. It was a total yawn, so this afternoon I did some drawing inspired by this guy’s conglomerate of all the best superheroes.
I originally intended to create a similar mish-mash of all the best super-villains, but I didn’t like how it was turning out. In the end I dropped some villains and added some more questionable inclusions.
My original line up included Magneto, the Joker, Dr Doom, Venom, Lex Luthor. I ended up dropping the Joker because I didn’t want to draw my villain in a suit and the only other iconic accoutrement that I know the Joker to possess is a flower on his lapel (squirts acid or lethal laughing gas) and a hand-buzzer (electrocutes people). Neither of those really worked for me either. I also dropped Magneto because his best-known feature is his dorky helmet and I thought Dr Doom’s head would work better.(esp. with the cloak I ended up using). One subtle element of Magneto is retained in the floating pose with cape, although this is also due to the replacements I chose for the Joker and Magneto.
I also considered Dr Octopus and Green Goblin for their octo-harness and the goblin glider respectively, but decided against. I did end up adding some Juggernaut, because I quite like the source of his power (The Crimson Gem of Cyttorak).
The two non-villain characters I decided to reference are Spawn and Dr Manhattan. While Spawn may technically be an anti-hero striving for his redemption from Hell, he did get sent to Hell for a reason (being a mercenary if I recall?) and now he works for them. He’s no white knight. Dr Manhattan may not be the villain in Watchmen, but he is increasingly alienated from humanity and he ends up agreeing with Ozymandias if I remember correctly. Plus I think he’s super awesome.
My Villain includes: Crimson Bands of Cyttorak on each arm (signifying his bond with the gem); Venom’s symbiote on his right hand; Lex Luthor’s kryptonite ring on his left hand; Dr Doom’s helmet; Spawn’s cloak; and Dr Manhattan’s transformed body (naked under the cloak obv).
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I recently contacted a potential employer about a writing gig. When they sent me the details, in the form of a writing brief, it was not exactly what I was expecting.
“Write a review of the latest paid version of the antivirus software called Zonealarm Internet Security Suite (please refer to it as Zonealarm rather than Zone Alarm). The review needs to follow a certain structure – please fill in the template at the end of this document.”
I have very little desire to research and review software, but I thought it would be rude to reply with nothing, or not reply at all. So I wrote something for them, inspired by Joey Comeau and Overqualified.
Title of your submission:
Sound the alarm - Zonealarm
Executive summary:
He recommended Zonealarm.
“To be honest, I’d have to recommend Zonealarm. It’s the leader in personal security.”
I trusted his dorky smile. Why wouldn’t I? He was so enthusiastic, it was infectious. I walked away with Zonealarm under my arm. The leader in personal security.
I felt safe already.
At home, in front of the computer, I watched it install. Text flashing before my eyes, “Thank you for choosing Zonealarm”. My first choice.
I watched as it catalogued all the data on my computer, singling out suspect files. Quarantining them.
“Permanently delete? Accept/Cancel”.
I accepted with a sigh of relief.
“Wipe complete. Thank you for using Zonealarm”.
Product review:
I woke up at 7:43 am with a strange ringing in my ears. I got out of bed. The world was silent, except for the strange humming. The computer had shut down automatically, after an antivirus scan.
I pressed the power button. Lights flickered as the engine whined into life.
I sat down at the computer desk, breakfast could wait. Zonealarm started to scan for spyware. I hit cancel. Zonealarm continued with the antispyware routine. I hit cancel again impatiently.
“Are you sure you want to cancel Zonealarm’s anti spyware scan? Cancel/Resume”.
Cancel.
I got back from breakfast to find a new window open on my web browser, “Zonealarm internet security”. It was at 93%.
I let it run.
After work I caught the bus home in the rain. I was tired, it was wet. When I arrived home it was dark. It took me three attempts to get the key in the lock.
My computer was on in the study. The monitor light projecting into the darkness. “Zonealarm antivirus protection”. I hit cancel on the scan as I sat down at my desk.
“Scanning…”
I looked to see what progress the scan was at. “7% complete”. I hit cancel again.
“Zonealarm antivirus protection: Tom Isaacs”
“Scanning…”
I rubbed my eyes. Did I register the software? What was it scanning? I looked at the files flashing across the screen.
“Financial Records: Business expenses 2009”.
Um?
“Quarantined files: 4,729”.
What? I hit cancel again.
“Quarantined files: 4,788”.
I pushed restart.
I tried to uninstall Zonealarm antivirus protection, but it would not be removed.
“Do you wish to uninstall Zonealarm? No/Cancel”.
Cancel. It began to scan again, “Virus scan: Tom Isaacs, condition: infected”.
I rang the number on the box, “Hello, this is Tom Isaacs. I bought Zonealarm Internet Security Suite and it’s acting rather oddly.”
“Thank you for calling Zonealarm” The robot replied. “If you are calling to inquire about a product please press 1.” Was I inquiring about Zonealarm or complaining? “If you are calling for customer service please press 2.” I pressed 2.
“Thank you, please hold.” I held.
Zonealarm was still scanning. Cancel.
“Childhood memories, quarantined files: 301”.
Childhood memories? This was getting ridiculous…
Cancel, cancel, cancel.
“325 files deleted.”
“We value your call, please hold.”
I knew it was silly, but I couldn’t help myself. I started thinking about my childhood. Rather, I started thinking about thinking about my childhood. What should I remember?
Kindergarten surely? But there was nothing. I was blank, empty. I remembered photos of my childhood but nothing went with the photos. It was like someone else’s life.
“Furniture, quarantined files: 7”
My stuff was disappearing, the apartment slowly emptying out. My couch was gone. My TV. The pictures on the wall. The ugly brown lamp.
“We value your call, please hold.”
I picked up a chair to smash the flickering screen, but it vanished mid-swing. When I reached for the power plug a second window opened threatingly.
“Body parts, quarantined files: 0”
I backed into the corner and watched as my life was erased. I watched as Zonealarm deleted my bank account, my work history, my fantasy about the girl from the foodmarket, my car.
I watched as it deleted my allergy to strawberries, my crippling anxiety, my ex-girlfriends. I watched as it wiped me clean of every fear and failing. Every insecurity. Every virus.
Pros:
It works quickly now.
Efficiently destroying every trace of my life. Killing me bit by bit. Bite by bite.
It misses nothing.
Cons:
I know that I should miss my family. My friends.
But I also know that I won’t.
I can’t and I’m glad.
Improvements:
Things have changed.
The sky was dark, but the dawn has come.
Product support:
I called the number, but they never answered.
No one answered.
Price range:
The price is incalculable. Every moment, good and bad, all gone. Every love lost. The time that I…
That I…
…
It will be worth it.
Awards recieved:
…
Parent company:
Thank God.
→ 8 CommentsTags: Writing
A week or two ago I stumbled across Eristical. Their stated aim is to showcase the strongest arguments on both sides of contentious issues. I submitted some of my thoughts on drugs, gay marriage, abortion and capitalism. I also submitted one in favour of gun control but I doubt my answer - guns kill people, duh - will be considered particularly strong.
I answered in support of capitalism:
In my understanding of capitalism corporations are established with the highest goal of financial success. This avarice is tempered by the government whose responsibility it is to write laws that limit the exploitation of people by corporations. This system works reasonably well in theory, until you realise that corporations provide financial support for political campaigns. Politicians who are beholden to a corporation have compromised their ability to make decisions that are in the best interests of the people. I believe a reasonable way to combat this would be to limit the size of campaign contributions and to make sure that all political finances are open to public scrutiny.
But assuming that the government can fulfill it’s role in mediating the influence of corporations and championing the best interests of the people, then I think capitalism is probably the best system available to us.
Later I was watching a discussion about the economy on NewsHour with Jim Lehrer. I have a lot of respect for NewsHour because they invite a variety of critics and experts as well as politicians and political aids to discuss issues. This is important because the show is not just political spin, there is an attempt to really inform the public. During the show one of the guests stated that the Government should not be interfering with the running of banks.
This is the free market. This is small government.
The banks have made a cock-up of astronomical proportions, but the government should mind it’s own beeswax? The American economy has taken a massive hit, but the government should back off? When should the government step in?
My understanding of the American government is that it exists to do things for the people that they would struggle to do on their own without a single governing body e.g. building infrastructure like roads and schools, maintaining peace through police and armed forces. This is what their taxes pay for.
According to the doctrine of small government, favoured by Republicans, there should be as little interfering with the day to day running of life as possible. Taxes should be as low as possible and there should be as few laws as possible. Government works best when you don’t even notice it’s there. And this idea extends to business (at least theoretically - see Bush administration). Small government doesn’t interfere in the free market. Small government lets companies do what they want because markets regulate themselves.
Except that they don’t.
For further reading Nobel laureate Joseph E. Stiglitz has an article in Vanity Fair about Wall Street and the Third World. For a little light reading I suggest Jennifer Government by Max Barry, a brilliant satire of small government and free markets.
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As I have previously mentioned I have been writing a super hero comic in my spare time. Lately this hasn’t involved much beyond thinking about a viable plot for the third chapter. I had a vague idea of what I wanted but I had to make everything fit.
Some time in the last few days I started to write my ideas down. Today I pitched the storyline to my brother and he liked it! But, perhaps more importantly, he didn’t point out any plot holes or inconsistencies. Unfortunately for me Mike (the artist for the comic) is going through a pretty rough/busy patch so it will probably be a while before writing meets reality.
In the meantime I have been thinking about drawing a teaser comic, a little something before the main comic begins. I am a passable cartoonist (I’ve had lots of practice during lectures) but I’m nowhere near as good as Mike. Mainly I think it will be a bit of fun!
The teaser comic will be set in the same world as the main comic (i.e. superheroes etc), but it will otherwise be a stand-alone story. I took some time off from studying this afternoon and drew a few rough concept sketches for the teaser.
I hope you enjoy:
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I have applied for a few jobs recently. Most of them are writing gigs (hi guys). I think it would be pretty exciting to write professionally and I’m anxiously awaiting their replies. One of the jobs I applied for was a bit unusual and can only be vaguely (and somewhat inaccurately) described as a writing gig. The company in question is hiring people to transcribe dialogue as spoken by British people.
Part of the process of application required me to do an online test in two parts. Both parts were listening and recording exercises, but the quality of the recordings varied significantly. In the first part of the test the recordings were of a consistently high quality and the dialogue was spoken slowly and clearly. The speaker had a noticeable English accent, but it was reasonably mild and he was making an extra effort to enunciate each word.
In contrast the second half of the test was completely rubbish quality. Imagine trying to make a mobile call in the bathroom at a crazy party, the reception is really bad and your call goes to answering machine anyway. You leave a message on your friend’s antique machine only to have it picked up years later by a mysterious company who want it transcribed for their own inscrutable reasons. The answering machine may have fossilised in that time, I really can’t say. The people in the recordings were speaking fast and mumbling and umming and ahhing. Their accents weren’t unintelligible by any means, but the words all seemed to flow together and it was quite frustrating to transcribe.
By and large the nature of the second group of recordings seemed to be academic, so I can posit a reasonable hypothesis for the task. But I like to imagine that I’m recording the last interactions of a group of scientists at a secret facility. They thought they could play God and now they’re being wiped off the walls. It’s my job to find out… What. Went. Wrong.
From the safety of my own home bed.
(Under the covers)
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If you were going to give a character time manipulation powers how would you make it work? I have been thinking about this today while playing Braid. It’s a cute little platformer, reminiscent of Mario in many ways, that requires you to solve puzzles. The main weapon in your arsenal is your ability to turn back time. I have seen the power before in Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time, but it is utilised much more effectively in Braid. Instead of just using it to reverse deaths and falling off things your effective manipulation of this power becomes the central focus of the puzzles.
The first possible method of time manipulation is simply time travel. Except that simple is not a word I would ever use to describe time travel! First you have to decide what theory of time travel you want to use and then you have to make sure you stick to it. You also have to contend with the idea that your time traveller could theoretically change anything in the story, even his own death (depending on which theory you settled on). While this could make for a really interesting narrative it does have the problem of overshadowing other characters in the story, making their actions seem somewhat futile.
One way to limit the scope and power of this ability would be to give it some parameters. For example the Groundhog Day technique: the power allows the character to travel back in time exactly twenty four hours (and obviously he can’t use his power more than once every twenty four hours).
Another common application of time manipulation is the ability to freeze time. This is a very powerful ability as it leaves your opponents completely unable to defend themselves. A more reasonable version is the ability to slow time, effectively making the character super fast, but also giving them more time to think and react (a significant advantage over super-speed). An even more limited version of this power would allow the character to slow or stop individual objects such as a hail of bullets. A particularly devastating application of this power would be to freeze an explosive the instant after it has been detonated, releasing it later at a moment of your choosing.
A slightly more bizarre power might allow the character to manipulate the age of a target, turning a person into an old man or a squawling infant. This power is also quite powerful and has serious ramifications for any individual it is used upon. Characters made younger can recover in time (or benefit from the experience), but characters made prematurely old have no such consolation, that is unless you make the effects temporary. A different version of this power would give the character the ability to manipulate his own age. Possible uses of this power include the ability to disguise oneself as a person of another age, to heal non-fatal wounds quickly and to remain eternally youthful.
For those who’ve read Watchmen (or seen the film) Dr Manhattan displays an unusual characteristic in that he appears to know in the present everything he has ever known and will ever know. He is not omniscient, but he does not seem to function entirely on a linear timeline. There was a beautiful chapter in Watchmen that attempted to show Dr Manhattan’s non-linear perspective, but I for one don’t have the confidence to attempt it. A less problematic version of this power would allow the character to see into the past or future, without actually leaving the present.
Let me know if there’s anything I have missed!
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